Mind Bizniss

Me?

Bas me does keep to me self, bas’ me nuh mind people bizniss…

But if me did mind people bizniss an chat people bizniss

Me woulda tell you bout Cindy…

Yeah Cindy nuh man?!

You know she man, de big batty gyal from bottom village

Well she say she ah go pan diet fi lose weight

Fi de man she done hab five and a half picnkey fa

An how she ah nyam nothing but pineapple, banana, grapes, lettuce an wata

Till she pop down and nearly pronounce ‘dead on arrival’ at Mount St John

But me? I don’t have time to mind people bizniss.

Wha? Anna dat min happen…

Hey me say anna so ‘I go…

Jason min get the phone call the morning right after him reach a work-

Hello! Me say he min done reach a work, dat a how he min mek it back a yard jus likkle after 10

Me? Me min dey a mind me bizniss a wash de pickney dem clothes

Next ting me hear ruckshan brock out, Milli ah bawl down more murder an Jesus, looka naise me dear

like say de house a brock down

an den one black smadee wit all he bizniss out a door fly tru d bedroom window like one movie star

ah pelt up de road like say him ah Usain Bolt

But me? Me just mind me own bizniss see buddy. Me nuh hab time fi study neaga bizniss

You hear me?

I does not mind peoples bizniss

But if me did do,

then me would tell you how Bella hab two man,

one ruff lookin one dat does ring she out ah day time

an wan fat white one wit um big car she does ring out ah night time.

And how since me did know she, Sophie gut always swell up wit pickney

And how Mason have 4 job 5 woman and 13 pickney and nah feed nuttin but prostitute

But me? Me na have time fi mind neaga bizniss

Eh-eh, So me guess nuh hear how maxim third son get deported from merica, and how the first son rich like dirt living in France but cyan send a coppa to he mooma. But the likklest one, d last girl she get island scholar and she plan to go way and study and own she own business.

Me also did hear say Sandra and she Trini husband find Jesus and de holy ghost and join Jehovah witness

Ah tru aye, you nuh believe me? Look d watch tower magazine she gi’ me when she corner me infront ah Rising Star.

Me bet you nah min know say Buss’een lef jail. Chupz? Chupz? You nuh bizniss.

Well you better bizniss. You nuh know wha he ennup ah jail fa? A 8 man get sen up ah has’ital

Cause ah he nuh, papers say he min pon a rampage, an how the judge say him guilty of first degree buggery wit malicious intent. But now me a look pon you, you best leff u money where it drop see, dem say he lob bwoy whey favour foo you complexion

Me? Me just mind foo me bizniss see, me na able. Me nuh hab time fi mind—

Eh eh. Fu who black cyar dat deh? Backside! Ah whey she ah go dress so…

MIND YOU BLASTED BIZNESS MAN

YOU Y’EYE TOO DYAMN LANG!

Glen Toussaint ©2012